The cheap seats.

Lately I have been doing a lot of driving. And with that comes a lot of free time. To think. And I have been thinking about what I want to say in this next post for about a week now.  A million ideas have run through my head, some fun and some sad and some inspirational, but this is what I have come up with...

Last night I watched one of my favorite movies, "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist," and it has one of my all time favorite movie quotes in it...

Norah: Aren't you sad that we missed it.
Nick: We didn't miss it. THIS *IS* IT. 

Just let that soak in for a second.

Along those very same lines, I heard this interview with Regina Spektor about her new CD (which I am currently obsessed with...) titled "What we saw from the cheap seats"... and she explained how that IS life. The view from the cheap seats. The party happening all around you.... even when you are so far away that you can't barely see the actual show. It is what is happening RIGHT NOW.

And why live your life sitting pretty in the front row center. Don't you want some room to dance? Some freedom to go a little crazy and celebrate just being alive. That's what Nick was saying in that movie... "This *is* it".... life is going on all around you... not just in those moments that you plan out... but in EVERY moment. It is that random bar that me and Brooke stumbled upon a couple of weeks ago. It is doing a dragon puzzle with Erick and Emmy. It is a Zumba dance party with my best friend Jo. It is that beautiful little spot between two mountains where my dad took me on the lake. It is driving down the interstate bawling my eyes out because this song hit way to close to home. It is being the silliest packer of all time with Corie and Kylie and Vikas... and cracking up the whole time we moved into my new house.

And I think that is the most beautiful part of life: that we can't stop it from spiraling faster and faster with every passing day. All we can do is enjoy it... As Regina sings in Small Town Moon "We're gonna get real old real soon... Today we're younger than we are ever gonna be...!!!"

But is it just about living life to the fullest? Isn't that what I am ALWAYS saying?? Yes... but also, no. Because it is about striving to live the life God has laid out in front of us. But in my opinion these things go hand and hand... because I am a true believer that God didn't put us on this earth to be miserable. Yes we will all go though things, and we will all have our faith tested at one point or another. I have been reflecting lately on the letters of Saint Paul...

"You have followed my teaching, way of life, purpose, faith, patience, love endurance, persecutions, and sufferings... persecutions that I endured. Yet from all these things the Lord has delivered me." (2 Tim 3: 10-11)

And in today's second reading from Mass:
Brothers and sisters:
We are always courageous,
although we know that while we are at home in the body
we are away from the Lord,
for we walk by faith, not by sight.
Yet we are courageous,
and we would rather leave the body and go home to the Lord.
Therefore, we aspire to please him,
whether we are at home or away.
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ,
so that each may receive recompense,
according to what he did in the body, whether good or evil. (2 Cor 5:6-10)

Although sometimes it may seem that life is throwing you too much to handle... it is SO on purpose. And God only tests those who He knows can endure and not only endure, but THRIVE in the lessons that can only come from such a test. And He gives you the courage and perseverance to get through...

You see from all of this crazy mess that I have to go through... I have gained more that cancer could have ever taken away from me. Right now, looking back, I am thankful that God felt I was strong enough to handle so much. You see, I know now that nothing life throws at me is impossible. I have realized my strength. And I have gained perspective and a whole new way of seeing life. Not very many people are lucky enough to ever really understand the things I have caught a glimpse of. I have been blessed with the ability to really APPRECIATE. And through that appreciation, to really LIVE.

It is something that I must realize every day upon waking. Hello new day... good to see you... what blessings can I find in you today? I look each challenge in the face and step right over it and go right on living again. Because life is happening even in those challenging moments... especially in those challenging moments. And when we can learn to be happy and praise God even when enduring what seems impossible at the moment.... that is when you are TRULY living.

And so I won't waste my life dwelling on the bad... but rather I will focus on counting my blessings and on smiling in the face of adversity. It is jamming out from the "cheap seats"... it is realizing that "this *is* it"...

Liv